Hi everyone and Happy New Year. Happy 2018. This is the first Facebook Live for the New Year, and I am really looking forward to a lot of interesting conversations with you over the next year.

I wanted to get started today with the topic that I see hitting the screens, social media, all over the place. It’s kind of rampant in the last few days, in particular.

I’m trusting you all had a good Christmas and a good New Year. You’ve had time for some rest and relaxation, I hope, in between all of the shopping, the wrapping, and the running around with family. Always good to at least take a day of rest. I saw a lot of people out walking around here on New Year’s Day, and it was something like 25 below zero, but I just saw and felt a sense of comfort and relaxation as people were strolling along with their kids in the sleigh, and their dogs in their sweaters, and it was just kind of nice to sense that lower energy and sense of peace.

Speaking of energy, I wanted to talk to you about the theme, as I said at the top of this call, it’s all about goal-setting. I’m sure you’ve been inundated with emails, blog posts, Facebook posts, comments, graphics, and all of that around goal setting for the New Year. I’ve seen all of that too.

What I find really interesting, over the many years that I’ve worked with corporations, that I’ve worked with non-profits, that I’ve worked with individuals on that topic of goal setting, what continues to amaze me is how many people actually don’t know how to set goals. Again, in all the work that I’ve done with individuals, in particular, is that many people don’t even know what they want, so how are you going to set a goal when you have no clue what you want? Women, in particular, who have put a lot of their dreams and their goals aside for many years while they focused on everything and everybody else.

So I came up with a very simple formula. Those of you who know me know that I like to keep things simple, and I like to keep them easy and uncomplicated, and so I wanted to share that with you today, and that’s why I titled this, “What you really need to know to get up and running in 2018.”

There are two steps that I want to share with you that I believe will be helpful, and I would encourage you to share with your friends because, again, many people just get stumped on that whole topic of setting goals and sharing dreams, and so on.

Two things that can get you going. Number one is, to get started and to get the brain fluid flowing here, is to be thinking about what you don’t want. Instead of struggling and feeling challenged and overwhelmed about identifying what you do want, and moving that into a goal format and then an action step, and so on, take a reverse look at it and be thinking about what you don’t want anymore. I call that tolerations. What are you tolerating right now?

What are you tolerating? In my two-step process, I encourage you to do this. Number one, get an index card or a piece of paper, or whatever works for you, and be listing down here. Make a list of 10 things that you’ve been tolerating. I can give you an example. I moved into this new apartment, and one of the things I had been tolerating is that I have a huge entry here, which I didn’t have before in my house, and I was tolerating walking right in on the ceramic floor, and actually it’s slippery. I never had that before either. So I was tolerating that, and I finally got around to finding and purchasing a fabulous mat for the entryway, so check that off the tolerations list.

Look at it in that way. What have you been tolerating? What is it you no longer want to tolerate? Make a list of 10 things. Keep it simple. For the most part, I get my clients to do this on their intake form when they start working with us, and when I look at it, a lot of the new clients will say, “Oh, I’m a little ashamed or embarrassed about this,” and I’m saying to them, “Listen, your top 10 tolerations are pretty universal. For many people, it’s a messy desk. For some people at this time of year, it’s a cluttered fridge with a lot of little leftovers. For many people, you’re tolerating an overdue bank account, for some of you who are new in business, perhaps. Some of you are tolerating the extra weight that you’re carrying around. Some of you are tolerating some of the people in your life. I’m getting a little deeper here. I didn’t intend to go that far.

Another thing, for me, I have a basket by my couch in the living room. It was piling up with magazines that I intended to read, and every now and then I’d go by that basket and I’d kick it, and everything would fall out and I’d pile it back in again. I was tolerating that and I decided on the weekend, no more. That’s done. That’s annoying me, so I just pitched the magazines.

You can keep it simple. Make your list of tolerations. What are you tolerating? What is it you no longer want? Make that list and make an action plan to deal with those 10 items. That’s goal setting.

To flip it and get on with the process of goal setting for the year, then all you do is take the list of tolerations and flip them. If it’s a messy desk, your goal would be to have a neat, organized, sparkling clean desk, much like Heather Reid posted on January 1st.

Be thinking in terms of what are you tolerating, what do you no longer want? Make that list and deal with it, flip that over, and that becomes a goal.

If you want to take that on the bigger scale, in the bigger scheme of things, then once you have done this little technique and you have some momentum going, then move it to the bigger scale. Another tool that I use is the Life Balance Wheel. It’s a simple life balance wheel and, if you can see on some of the spokes, it identifies areas like finances, community work, money, relationships, and so on. You can just Google “life balance wheel” and you’ll get all kinds of formats and tips on how to work with it. I find this very helpful and I do this twice a year. I do it personally, and I created it, actually, in a business format also.

Here’s the thing. Business gets better when you get better, so you have to start with yourself. Start with your own life balance wheel. There are a lot of spokes here, and that could be overwhelming. I choose to work with only three spokes. I will do the whole wheel and then I will put it on a scale of one to 10, where do I believe I am and what does it look like and feel like today, and I’ll put the dot on the spoke. Then I’ll connect the dots, and you’ll see if your wheel is out of balance or out of alignment. Most of us are.

Once you’ve done that, then choose three of the spokes. Keep it simple. Choose three spokes that you want to work on in the next three to six months, and then for each spoke, identify three goals. I’m going to take health again because it’s January and I hear people saying, “I want to lose weight, I want to exercise more, I want to quit smoking, I need more sleep,” all of those things. Go down on my personal Facebook page. You’ll see the graphic that I posted yesterday. I believe there are some buttons on there and you may be able to identify with those. I want more sleep, better sleep, I want more money, and so on.

So pick three spokes, create three goals, move them to your calendar. That’s the success strategy. Moving them to your calendar is a non-negotiable item, and then get to work and get it done, but the first step is to back up and go through your tolerations list. What are you tolerating? Tolerations are a negative energy, and it takes a lot of energy to reach your goals, a lot of positive energy, so focus on removing the tolerations first, then filling that gap with positive energy, and then clarity around three things that you do want to have happen in your life so that it looks better, it feels better, and you’re a happier person.

And that’s it. That’s what I wanted to share with you because I wanted to help some people get out of that stuckness around oh my gosh everybody’s talking about setting goals, and I don’t know how, and I don’t know where to start, and I don’t know what I want.

Those are my two best tips. I love your comments. Feel free to share the video. I believe this will be helpful to many people, and that’s all for now. Thanks for being with me. More to come next week. Bye everyone.