Holidays: Thanksgiving, family, food, stress, schedules, ……and a few simple ways to cope, be grateful and be happy!

Hi everyone, it’s Pat here. I was just sitting here at my desk a short while ago and came to the realization that, oh my gosh, next Monday, this coming Monday is Thanksgiving in Canada. Like really, where’d the summer go? Where did September go? But we’re in October and yes, next Monday is Thanksgiving, and that means a long weekend for all of us, for which we’re thankful.

It also means, and I know by now, I am recording this on a Tuesday, that there is anxiety building among many people, and so as I sat at my desk, thinking about my own situation and how that might differ from many of yours, I wanted to share some of my simple tips. I love keeping life simple. Share some of my simple tips for getting a grip.

Now, for those of you who are listening in the United States and/or abroad, your holidays are coming, and so learn from us. We will be the leaders here. Your holidays are coming, and your times of challenge and stress, and family and food, and overwhelmed, that’s all coming at you. So sit back. Grab a few tips here. These are simple and these work. These have worked for me in the past, they work for me in the present, and these will help you get some stability, have some gratitude, be happy, and enjoy being in the moment. So here we go.

What I wanted to say, first of all, is one of my secrets to success is to plan. It’s all about planning. Many people these days are going through life haphazardly and just taking it as it comes. Thanksgiving’s a few days away now, and for some of you, as I said, a few weeks away, and so plan ahead. When I talk about planning, I look at it in different categories.

The first one is, especially, around your schedule. Look ahead and decide for the day, for the weekend, for the week, what is your schedule looking like? Cut yourself some slack, people. Those of you who are hosting, learn to say no to some things. My whole theme is it’s not about perfection. Perfection doesn’t exist, so let it go. Let it go. Look at your schedule. The first thing I encourage you to do in the whole planning aspect is yeah, put you first. Put you first, because honestly, who wants to spend a Thanksgiving meal or holiday with someone who’s going around feeling mean, tired, and ugly?

Is that you? All right, then you have time to plan for this. So plan your schedule. Learn to say no to some things. There’s nothing wrong with that. Keep it simple and focus on the meaning, the intention of the holiday – Thanksgiving, and stay focused on that.

The second one is around your activity. So your schedule is one thing. Your activity level is another thing. Look at planning something that can be done outside. Everybody doesn’t have to be sitting around the living room snacking or sitting for an extended period around the dining table. Go for a walk. Go for a drive. The colors are beautiful at this time of year, and some of the best conversations are had when we’re walking or when we’re driving. So think about your activity level.

Now, on a personal note, think about your activity level through that holiday weekend. Make sure you plan for your own exercise. It can be as simple as 10 to 15 minutes of activity first thing in the morning. Otherwise, it probably won’t get done. So plan your own activity and ensure that you hold true to yourself when it comes to exercise, nutrition, hydration, even some moments of meditation. So important.

Now the food, that’s a big one because, of course, a lot of Thanksgiving focuses around food. Now, there’s no bad foods, and those of you who know me know that I live an 80/20 lifestyle. So for 80% of the week, I’m going to be right on with my nutrition choices, because that’s how I choose to live and I feel better that way. The 20% time comes when there’s a holiday. So of course, you’re going to choose and indulge in a few things that you wouldn’t normally, but plan for it. Drink a lot of water, cut back on alcohol consumption, make choices between alcohol, snacks or desserts. You don’t have to have it all in one day.

Make some choices and then be good with your choices. I mean, be good with it. No guilt. Guilt-free. And enjoy. Life is meant to be enjoyed. So know that and be in the moment, and enjoy that. So be wise when it comes to your food choices and be selective. I call it quality calorie intake. Be selective. Not all of the treats out there are good for you, and you know it, so choose well and choose wisely, and enjoy. So that’s the activity, that’s the food schedule, and your own schedule.

Now the second piece is around fighting perfection. Let that whole concept go. There is no such thing as perfection. Give it your best shot, and that’s it, and bring your best self. Again, how you bring your best self is to take care of yourself leading into the holiday, and include sleep in that factoring. Include sleep. Because we know we’re all at our best when we’ve had a good night’s sleep. So that’s critically important too.

One of the other things I wanted to suggest is to try something new. You know, we’re in an age now where our parents are aging, if, in fact, they’re even still here with us. So this may be the ideal time this year for you to try something different. Perhaps have a family dinner at a restaurant. There’s nothing wrong with that. In fact, what it does is it enhances conversation, it lessens stress, and it encourages a lot of engagement. So consider that as a change or for something different. You might want to be thinking about starting new traditions, and that’s a very good thing.

One of the other notes I wanted to make for you, if you’re alone on a holiday, and you know, Thanksgiving is coming up and after that is Christmas, and it’s holiday season. If you’re alone, you have no family around you or you’re new to a certain location, then go volunteer somewhere. When I first moved to London, that’s one of the things I did during the holidays. I went and volunteered. It served a few purposes. One, I wasn’t alone. Two, I typically came to realize very quickly how blessed I am, how grateful I have become for what I do have. Three, you can meet some new people and hear some interesting stories, and bring your full self to the volunteer activity.

For those of you who are in a position and you know somebody who’s alone, for heaven sakes, don’t assume that somebody else has invited them. Reach out and give them the opportunity to say, “No thanks.” But step it up. Look around. Pay attention to people. There’s a lot of lonely people these days. In fact, it’s an epidemic, I read. So reach out and invite someone into the empty chair in your home. You’ll be happy you did. They’ll be happy that you did.

Lastly, one of my tips for you is to go tech free. Put the devices down. In fact, put them away and be present. Focus on the people that you’re going to be with. That is the spirit of Thanksgiving, in my opinion. You want to stop and be engaged, really listen to people. Look in their eye. Are their words and their actions matching what you see in their eye and feel in their soul? Really pay attention. People are hurting these days. They are overwhelmed. They are over-stressed. Come together. Breathe, relax, enjoy some good food, and be of good company. Put the devices away. I challenge each and every one of you to do that, at least for a day.

Then lastly, what I want to say to you, whether you’re alone, whether you’re with people, is to develop the attitude of gratitude. Any of you who know me know that I keep this journal. I’ve been doing it for 23 years. Every day, I end my day by writing down five things for which I’m grateful. All of us, we are so blessed. We have abundance. We have so much, and particularly, this coming weekend in Canada, as we celebrate Thanksgiving, why don’t you perhaps get a few index cards, put them as place settings at your table, and before you start the meal, have everyone write down at least one thing for which you’re grateful. It doesn’t have to be huge. It can be little. Just look around and be thinking. Google some ideas of things to be thankful for.

What I love about this gratitude journal is, right in the beginning of it, because this may be a new habit, and probably is for many people, what Sarah Ban Breathnach does is she gives you examples of things to be grateful for. Twelve hours uninterrupted sleep, holding your child in your arms, no matter what their age, witnessing the birth of a new life, trying something new, watching the sunset. Oh, bam, that’s mine. Not having to cook tonight, if you follow up on my suggestion to go to a restaurant. Acceptance after struggle.

There’s just so many ideas in here. Gratitude for receiving flowers. Gratitude for letting go gracefully. So, if you don’t have this book, perhaps if you’re a guest somewhere, bring this book to the dinner. But bottom line, it’s as simple as getting an index card, having everyone write down one thing, start your Thanksgiving dinner with the intention of gratitude, share what you’re grateful for, and then be present and enjoy.

I’m grateful for each and every one of you. I’m grateful for technology, that I can share this message with you, and I would love to hear from you as to which of these tips you decide you’re going to implement. And please hit the share button. There are many people, especially in Canada, who could benefit from this message today as they prepare and head into our holiday weekend.

Thank you, everyone. Enjoy the rest of your day.