Do you ever get the feeling that you are under-valued and under-appreciated? Are you ever stressed to the max at certain times of the year? These feelings can happen both professionally and personally – and particularly around the holidays, such as Christmas.

I have learned that the negative feelings tend to arise because of poor communication – and usually on my part! When we have a clear idea of what we want – what we expect – business dealings can be so much easier when we have the vision, communicate the vision and share the expectations on a regular basis.

Here are some easy steps to get you through the ‘rain’ –

1)    Identify What You Want!

I am often telling my clients the importance of this when it comes to business. Right now, at Christmas time, it’s also important to share this ‘vision/dream’ with your family. In fact, this ‘message’ should be shared months in advance of a major holiday. My girlfriend and I often have this discussion when it comes to our birthday, Christmas, summer vacation – once we turned 50, we stopped ‘expecting’ that other people would know what we want – how we would want it – and when. We decided to take charge – take responsibility for our own happiness – and create our own ‘experiences’. Same can hold true for Christmas – if you have a certain ‘Folgers’ (coffee commercial) dream/picture in your head about what Christmas should look and feel like, then it’s really important that you communicate that to your family.

2)      Ask For Help!

So many of us (women) are fiercely independent and attempt to do everything ourselves – and then ‘play the victim’ – when the gifts need to be bought, the baking to be done, the cards to be sent out and so much more. Just because you used to do things a certain way, doesn’t mean it needs to continue in that exact same way. Change is good! Let people help you – and don’t expect them to do things in the same way that YOU do them – and that’s ok! Let it go……..and start to relax and enjoy life a bit more.

3)    Be In The Moment.

We spend a lot of time preparing for things – preparing for events – preparing for holidays. We often forget about the people we are with – and that’s really what memories are all about. (Think back to that Folgers coffee commercial – it’s about the people!) Be in the moment. What gets done gets done. Anything else – well – really – who cares? Make a conscious effort, particularly in the next 2 weeks, to BE with the people you love and care about. BE with your friends – make time for phone calls, coffee visits, guests for dinner – whatever the opportunity. It’s the people who matter – because, as we age, when they’re gone, they’re gone!

Merry Christmas, everyone!

What will you do different this holiday season? Please share your thoughts!